ADRIAN FAY 1863 LETTERS
November 1863
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NO LETTERS FROM 10/19/63 THROUGH 11/14/63. FROM CONTENT OF 11/15/63 LETTER IT APPEARS ADRIAN HAD BEEN HOME ON A FURLOUGH. INDEED, IN A SELF-WRITTEN RECORD OF HIS SERVICE, HE WROTE THAT HE HAD GONE HOME ON FURLOUGH TO VOTE IN THE NOVEMBER ELECTION.
Davids Island Nov 15th / 63
I will write you a short letter to day and if I stay here I will write you a good long letter & tell you all the news. I dont expect we shall stay here any longer than this week but I hope I shall stay long eneough to get a letter from you. We got to the City yesterday a bout 11 o clock. Had a verry good time coming. It did not seem half so long to come here as it did to go from here home. We took the Boat at noon yesterday & got up here to this Desolate Island
a bout 3 o clock in the afternoon. It is such a terable lonsome place here. One day seems longer than a week did in that arful place Shintown [a locality in Great Valley, NY]. I wish I was there to day. Erast [Erastus French] & Hank [probably George H. Kelley, 6th NY Cavalry] are writing. But I do not know who they are writing to. Oh Sadie if you could have seen the many tears that was shed for Erastus & Henry when they got a board the Cars. ButnoneforAdd. Cynthia Cryed & Mira Cryed& Mary Cryed. Kate Cryed& Phely Cryed & Susan Cryed& Phiney Cryed & all cryed because Erastus & Henry was going a way. But not on eof them said as much as good by to me. But I guess I shall stand it and live just as long as I should if they had shed a Pail full of tears for me. Dont you think I shall? Sadie.
Sadie I was mad as I could be that day I came a way at something Father said. I know you and all that was in the room notaced it. They could not help it. But he did not think of saying any thing rong when he spoke. It was a blundering mistake of his. I hope you do not think he ment to say any such a thing on perpus. But I was so mad I did not know what to do with my self. I guess Et thought I was not verry sociable while we was going down to the [Allegheny] River [to the Great Valley train station]. She kept talking to me all the way untill we got to the corner of the road where she got out. I dont know wheather I answerd half the questions she asked or not.
I was thinking of somthing else all the while she was talking. Dear Sadie I have thought of you more than 2598 ¾ times since I started to come here & a week a go to night I was engoying my self good. Sadie you must excuse me for writing such a poor letter & with a pencil too. If you can read it you will do well. I will write again in a short time & I will try & do better next time. Write as soon as you get this will you Darling for I want to hear from you soon.
Verry truly yours Adrian
U.S. Hospital
Davids Island
New York Harbor
I am a shaimed of this letter Sadie. Writen with a led Pencil & in such a hurry too. I dont believe you can read it. If you cant
Burn it up
[Below is in Sarah’s writing]
My own own Darling
Davids Island
Nov 18th / 63
My Darling Sadie
I wrote you a Sort of a letter Sunday [Nov. 15] but it was writen in such a hurry that I dont believe you can read half of it. So I thought I would try and write another to day and see if I could do any better this time. We got here all safe and I guess we are engoying our selvs as well as the times & place wil admit. Henry [Kelley] is seated at the same table with me writing
to some one. He says he is writing to Mati Fay. May be he is. & Erast [Erastus French] has just lit his Pipe & go out to smoke, for they wont alow smoking in the Wards. So the Poor Boy is oblige to go out doors & stand in the coldrain& take his comfort all a lone to himself. Erast will leave us in a day or two & go to his Regt [6th NY Cavalry]. The Dockter reported him fit for duty yesterday. I dont know when he will think I am fit for duty. Perhaps before many days. I hope so any way for I do not want to stay here a great while. It is so awful lonsome here. I had as leaves by in Shintown I think as here.
Erast just came in & has been bothering Hank & me so that we could not write. I just gave him a penny and told him to go down to the Sutlers & buy him a stick of candy. He took it & has gon & I hope he wont come here a gain untill we are done writing. I dont believe I can think of any thing to write that will be interesting to you. But I am so anxious to get a letter from you that I can hardly wate. I am in hopes of geting one this week. Do you think I will get one Darling? Dear Sadie I think of you more than 10000 times a day. I wish I could see you this after noon. But I am a fraid it will be a great while before I can see
you again. At least it will seem to me like a great while. But then I will not be impatient. I will constantly think of you Dear and wate patiently untill I am free from UncleSam. I would like to take a strole into Shinhollow this evning just to see how the folks all do & what they are all thinking a bout. I suppose Marm Harvey continues her hatred (or love rather) towards me as usal. How is it does little Shep go up the lain as often as he did before I came home. Erast has got back again. He is as hateful as he can be to bother any one when they are writing isnt he? Well Darling I must close now for the mail goes at three o clock & I shall have to hurry.
[Written upside down at top of page one:]
Write to me often Sadie & remember me in your Prairs & I will also remember you. This from your true & loving
Adrian
Give my love to Menia if you have more than you know what to do with and here is 1000 afectionate kisses for you Dearest Sadie Add
Davids Island
Nov 19th / 63
Dear Mother
I supose you would like to know if Add got through all right. I can tell you he did. We got to the City a bout 11 o clock Sauterday morning [Nov. 14]. The Boat lay at the Dock all ready to start so we got a board with out any trouble & got here a bout 3 in the after noon. I do not think I shall stay here long but then I cant tell how soon I may leave. Write &
Direct to U. S. Gen Hosp
Davids Island
New York Harbor
It rains here to day
Thats all
Adrian
Home Nov 19th / 63
My own Adrian
I received your letter last night and I cant tell you half how glad I was to get it. It seems as though you had been gone six months instead of only one week. I should have answered your letter last night but I was very tired. I came from K’s [Kelsey’s, Sarah’s sister] afoot yesterday morning and was busy all day then went over to meeting in the evening so you see I did not feel much like writing after I got home. I walked down to K’s Tuesday night with Minia [Herminia, Orville Flint’s wife]. I was foolish to go but I thought I should get a letter from you if I waited till morning. I did not get
any though so I walked down there for nothing. It does not seem possible that you were here a week ago tonight Darling. Then I could talk to you. Now I have to write and I cant write as I want to either. I have thought of more than a thousand things I wished to tell you since you went away but if we both live I will have a chance to tell you after “this cruel war is over.” Oh Add how I wish you could just step in and see me tonight. I guess there is no surprise party tonight so Sue would not have to come and ask if “Sarah and Adrian were at home.” I am awful glad we did not go to that party for Calkins’ folks did not fancy it at all and I am sure I enjoyed myself much better with you than the others did down there. All the Harvey tribe were at meeting but not one of them spoke to me last night. I managed to live through it and guess I shall survive if they never speak
to me again. Dont you wish I had gone with you to the [Allegheny] River so you could have had some tears shed for you when you went away? I guess I dont think as much of you as Phine and Sue do of their Soldiers. It was a long, lonesome, dreary, sad afternoon to me last Friday. Then you think no one cried because you went away. Well I dont believe in telling stories about my neighbors or I would tell you how Sadie cried that night after you went until she could scarcely see – foolish wasnt it? But Darling it didseem as though I couldneverletyougoback. I dont feel so now for I know it must be so and I try to make the best of it. That is the way to do isnt it? I remember what your Father said that morning but I did not think he meant anything. I never should have thought of it again. I dont think any of the rest noticed it but you and I. Perhaps you are too sensitive about any such thing. Dont you think you are?
It is splendid weather now – warm and smoky. I went up to Pert’s tonight and can hardly bear to stay in the house since I got back. It is such beautiful moonlight. I have thought of you but once since you left and that once means all the while. Add I wish I could tell you how much I love you and how my verylife is bound up in yours. I hope you will take good care of yourself and (if you ever do come back) come back as pure and true as when you left. I have thought a great deal about what you told me about Erastus [French]. I cannot keep it out of my mind. Et has just come in and is talking to me so I’ve forgot what sensible thing I was going to write. Please write soon to me will you for Add I wish to hear from you very often. Accept a dozen kisses from
Your own Sarah
This is a silly letter but I told you I was going to write just as I pleased and you said I might.
Sati
[Zachary] Taylor [Conklin] and George [Harvey] have gone to war [14th NY Heavy Artillery]. Irving [Flint, Sarah’s brother] wishes me to tell you that he forgot to skin the pigs yesterday but says next time he will remember and skinthem.
Davids Island Nov 23rd / 63
My Dear Sarah
I was so glad this morning when the mail came that I could hardly wate for it to be over halled. I was is such a hurry to get a letter from you for I knew there was one there for me. I was looking for one Saterday But was oblige to wate till this morning for the mail does not come here or go from here on Sunday. They are more pitular [particular] here than in most of places a bout doing any kind of buisness on Sunday. I dont think it need to make any diference among Soldiers.
Last week was the longest week I ever experianced. I do believe it seemed as though the week never would Pass a way and the time never would come when I should get a letter from Sadie. I tried allmost every Possable way to kill the time. I would read till I would get tired, then I would write to some one. Then Henry [Kelley] and I would walk a bout the Island (going a Casting as we called it) till we was tired of that. And so we managed to wair a way the lonely hours. And they are gon, and I have recd your letter and read it with all the eagerness that a Soldier will on receiving a letter from one he loves so Dear. And now I am trying to answer it. I hope you will excuse all
the horrid mistakes I am making for it is imposable for me to write without making more mistakes than a little. Sadie I have thought of a great many things that I wanted to tell you that I could not think of when I was there. But as you say if we both live the time will come when I can tell you all. And I hope that we shall not be Oblige to Part again ever while we live. I did hate to leave you Sadie. It seemed as though I couldnotcomea way and leave you. But I knew that I must go and therefore tried to make evry thing look as bright as I could. I thought it seemed harder for me to come a way than it ever did before, though I tried to make
myself think it was not so. I kept looking on the Bright Side all the while. That is the best way is it not Darling? I know you hated to have me go. But then it must be so. You know that a man while clad in U.S. Uniform must go acording to U.S. regulations and not acording to his own. That is, if he is sworn to do so, as I am. Sadie I shall ever remember the promace I made you. That if I ever do come back a gain, I will come back as pure from vice as I am now. And Prom[ise] myself ever true to you. I had a long chat with Erastus [French]. I dont believe he will do as he had don any more. I think he is sorry for what he has done already. Sadie dont for your life tell what I told you for fear his folks may hear of it. I would not have them know it for nothing.
[Written upside and in margin of page one:]
This is not much of a letter Sadie. But I shall have to close for it is time I was a bed & a sleep. Except many good wishes and loving kisses from your own Adrian – good night.
Tuesday Evning [Nov. 24, 1863]
Sadie I comenced a letter last night but I neglected puting it into the offace so it did not go out to day. And as it will not go out untill to morrow I thought I would make a little addition to it this evning and send it all along to gather. The days do not seem to be so long now as they did last week. I am geting so that I like the place here a great deal better than I did. We have pretty good times here a great deal better than I expected we would have when we first came here. They have got a library here where we can go and get a Book any time we want one.
There I have got this sheet turned in side out. Just my luck. But never mind. It is all in the three years. (as the Boys say). Sadie, I wish I could just stop in and see you to night. Would you like company this evning? You would like to go to a supprise Party to night wouldnt you. Will you go if I will? I am glad we did not go that night for I know that I engoyed my self a great deal better with you that I could Possably if I had gon down there. Not Withstanding I lost so much sleep by the means. But I soon got over that. And I would not mind loosing two or three nights sleep this week if I could be where I would like to be.
I suppose your School comences next Monday. How I wish I was a -. There I was a going to say Schoolmarm. I dont mean that. But a school Master so I could be teaching school rather than be here wating to get well eneough to go to the Front a gain. I hope you will have good luck this winter with your school and not have any great Ugly Hatefull schollars to get a long with. I told Et that I would send her some shells when I got back here to put in a Reath. But I have not found any verry good ones yet. There is not so good shells to be found here as I found on Bedloes Island last spring or else I have
not had the luck to find any so good looking ones. Well I guess I have writen a bout eneough this time. You cant read half of this I dont believe. Dear me. I wish I could see you. I cant think of any thing to write you this evning. Please write to a Poor mortal as often as you can and I will write as often as I can. Give my love to Sadie. Will you? And tell her I love her as the Only Dearest of all on earth for she is that to me. Now I must stop writing for it is geting late. But I am not sleepy though. I could easily sit up till 5 o clock if I was with you Dearest. Except a Dozen kisses from your Adrian.
Heven Bless you Darling and may we meet a gain.
Davids Island
Nov. 24th / 63
Dear Mother
I reicieved your letter yesterday morning. Was glad to hear from home again. I did not expect when I wrote to you before that I should stay here so long as I have But I have stade here this long and I do not know how much longer I shall stay. I shant go untill they get ready to send me. My health is quite good
now. I think I am as fit to go to the Regt as I ever shall be. I told the Dock so the other day. But he said wate a few days longer so I think I shall wate till he gets ready to send me a way. Erast [French] has gone. I got a letter from him to day. He is at Bedloes Island. But will be sent to Washington before a great while if he has not gone al ready. Henry [Kelley] is here yet. We shall keep to gather as long as we can. Well I have no news to write this time. Hoping to hear from you all soon. I am as ever your afectionate Son
Adrian
Davids Island Nov. 30th / 63
Dear Sister Mati
I received your letter this morning though short as it was. I was verry glad to get it. And I will try and answer it this after noon. I was expecting to go a way this morning. I have been reported for duty. But for some unknown reason I have not gon as I expected to day. I may go in a day or two & may not go in a week. You can direct your letters here as you have don before. Only dont put on the Mr. Please dont any more. I dont like to be called that name.
I am glad if you have had the luck to get rid of that Sheppard for I do hate any thing that has any thing to do with a Harvey or any of the tribe. Give them no reason to talk a bout you and let them a lone is the best way to get a long with them. I don’t think Hank [Kelley] cares any thing about any of them. But he is so easyly flaterd any one can do with him as they please. But he is a pretty good sort of a Boy. I like him a great deal better than I used to. I wish Montrose would write. But then I dont know where I shall be in 3 days from now. So if he should write it would be hard telling wheather I would ever get his letter or not. I shall leave here
in a few days I think for they are a going to Clear off the Island as fast as they can. I understand they was a going to have a lot of Rebs here a gain in a short time. If they do we shall go to some other place soon. We cant get to the Front now untill after the Armey stops marching and that wont be untill Mead [General George Meade] has taken Richmond. The Army of the Potomac will winter (if they winter at all) on the Panincila [York-James peninsula, Virginia]. Well I cant write any more this time. Write soon and tell me all the news.
Add
Adrian Fay Civil War Letters – Transcribed by Phil Palen
Pages in PINK are transcriptions of Xerox copies of letters sent to Phil Palen by the late Hollis Harvey Reed of Philadelphia, great-granddaughter of Adrian Fay through his daughter, Hollis Fay Fellows.
Pages in GREEN are transcriptions of originals owned by Phil Palen donated to St. Bonaventure University.
Pages in BLACK are transcriptions of originals owned by Patrick Gallagher donated to St. Bonaventure University.
Phil Palen added periods and initial capitals in these transcriptions, but did not change spellings.